Patty: This coffee Haagen Dazs is so delicious, I’ve decided NOT to marry Schlitzy and marry this ice cream instead.
Schnookie: Schlitzy says, “I got passed over for some ice cream. But I came back.”
Pookie: Someone drew a mustache on a picture of me, but I came back.
Pookie: I’m like, “Dammit! I should have taken that nap!” I didn’t take that nap, but I came back.
Schnookie: I took an AMAZING nap. But I came back.
Patty: I was forced to move into a Schlitz can, but I came back.
Kate: I just realized I’m out of dental floss. But I came back.
Patty: I flunked Comedy 101. But I came back.
Pookie: A co-worker just was really rude to me when I asked if she could access the web when her phone wasn’t working. I want Schlitzy to go over there and tell her, “My internet-based phone stopped working when my internet went out, but I came back.” And then kick her in the shins.
Patty: Some giant hockey player with a resplendent schnozz and wearing a Schlitz can just kicked me in the shins. But I came back.
Pookie: I died of laughter. But I came back.
Patty: “I hit a pole with my car. But I came back.”
Schlitzy: “That’s way tougher than I am!”
Heather: I got arrested for keying Sabres players’ cars. But I came back.
Pookie: I had nothing but popcorn and cupcakes for dinner, but I came back.
Schnookie: I was beaten down deep into the ground by my shitty team. But I came back.
ModFan: We haven’t posted in two months. But we came back.